Can't

Yet another opportunity
I've pushed away from
One of the countless times
I’ve lost without starting
I just stand there and stare
At them
Singing… playing…
Effortlessly
Self contained and so secure
While I’ve suddenly become mute
And I try to find a reason
To get away from the music,
From the tears welling up in my eyes
I’m not original
But neither are they
Then why does my voice
Just die away?
I’m suddenly so small
Can’t bear the thought of music
So scared…
to hear my voice…
…breaking
Music is good for the soul, isn’t it?
Then why does it do this to me?
Bringing out the worst…
…fear and misery
Should I just take a vow of silence?
And quit trying to try
Quit thinking
That maybe this time
Will be different
And save myself from
The embarrassing ordeal
Just quit..
You gave me everything
Why couldn't you give me
just a little bit of courage
to hear my own voice
sing
?